I woke up from my nap and Annette and I went on a walkabout and noticed our departure flight was not listed on the “departure board.” It didn’t set off any bells for me, but it did for Annette.  While I took a detour to find the bathrooms, she decided to take the initiative to ask the customer service desk about the departures board.  And thank goodness she did!  Turns out we needed to go through immigration and get into a whole other EU part of the airport?!  That process took quite some time and THEN after we got to the gate we had to take a BUS to our plane . . . that 5 hours disappeared pretty quickly!  Thank goodness she listened to her intuition that something was amiss, and took action?!  Because that was not on my radar at all.

It also happened on this trip that I needed some support - a little hot tea for a scratchy throat and some better ear plugs (as me AND my roommate discovered we both snore!)  NEVER underestimate the power of collective packing!   Multiple sisters had tea, sweeteners . . . hell one had a dehumidifier?!  Karen had the BEST earplugs (I now have ten pairs for future trips).  At first I beat myself up for not having “all the things” - I mean what kind of leader doesn’t have all the things?! . . . and then I realized THIS is the beauty of the NETWORK.  It’s a net that works - we catch each other, It’s COLLECTIVE safety and security, not bilateral and transactional.  

Another example happened on our flights home. We connected in Newark and we learned why everyone hates Newark.  Our plane was delayed multiple times . . .  you got on a tram AND a bus AND went through security multiple times.  It was just a bit of a struggle and at some point at the gate I just kind of crashed.  Like literally laid down and closed my eyes.  We FINALLY got on the plane and I settled into my seat and what did I hear one row in front of me?  Two Travel Sisters hyping up our network to their curious new seatmate, telling her all about us, asking me for a business card, happily looping her in and making her feel welcome.  I sat back in my seat and smiled, amazed and grateful.  
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You know what?  It’s going to be.  And it’s not all up to me. It’s the fruit of us being US. And it feels like incredible abundance and brings peace.  And I am here for it - hope you are too!

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It’s funny how when you travel, you grow.  You get out of the day to day “trance” and are more attentive, more alert.  It’s like your brain switches into a new gear.  While I’m on each trip, I usually notice a series of aha moments that, strung together, create a theme.  From Morocco, it was the power of freedom AND connection that this network offers for women.  We have just returned from a magical time in Costa Rica and, in keeping with the abundance that is Costa Rica, I received TWO “ahas!”
The first was . . . ASK for what you want!  You might have heard the social theory that people can be divided into two types of people:  “askers” and “guessers.”  The theory posits that the vast majority of us are “guessers.”  We don’t like to make people uncomfortable or put them on the spot, so we avoid asking them directly to DO anything or FOR anything unless we are fairly certain the answer will be “YES.” We don’t want to be told “NO” and the way to avoid that embarrassment for all parties involved is to read the scene, predict the perspectives of the roles involved, assume what can happen, and adjust accordingly. Women who have been socialized to be caring, thoughtful, considerate, or perfect might be especially prone to this psychological conditioning. This is me.  A thousand times a day.
There’s this whole other way to be in the world.  Just ask the “askers”!  They see no harm in asking, they take no affront or embarrassment at hearing no, and they see the world as chock full of possibilities!  They just bring their curiosity, see opportunity . . . and get in there and poke around.  And then just ask!  You can ask nicely, kindly, lightly - your body language can indicate resilience . . . and guess what?  Sometimes,the answer -  to your surprise -  might be YES!  
Two examples come to mind.  Well, three . . . but you don’t need to hear about “water into gin” miracles on the plane, lol. The first was at our Arenal resort at the base of the volcano.  We had a free afternoon and a few of us had gone to the spa, a few to a nearby hot springs, and a few to nap,  and some of us migrated back to the pool about 5pm.  There was a restaurant / grille by the pool and a few sisters wanted to grab a light dinner there instead of the main dining room.  At 5:09 when I approached the counter to order I could see they were putting food away, cleaning up, etc.  When I asked about ordering food, the body language was off.  It looked like they were all packing up to end their shift and the last thing they needed was a nacho order.  We’ve all been there, so in bad Spanish I asked if I should just go to the main dining room later and they said yes.  A little disappointing but not a human rights crisis by any means. 
As I head back to our room I encountered other Travel Sisters preparing to go to the pool to eat; they were under the impression that there was a whole food scene about to break out there.  I told them my doubts but realized I wasn't SURE (my Spanish IS really bad) and off they went to investigate and ASK.  Turns out there was a whole OTHER dinner shift that started at 6pm and those workers were thrilled to see them and made the most amazing meal that they all shared and enjoyed immensely.  If I had just asked, expected abundance, kept my mind open that my assumptions might not be big or true enough, I too would have discovered what they did.  ​

The second example happened on the flights home.  There were some sisters who were hoping to get their interview at Miami immigration/ customs so they could get their global entry status completed.  Our flight got in at 5:46 and the website said the office closed at 6:00pm.  Bummer.  But one sister decided to just ASK the scary people behind the glass and guess what? They do interviews anytime until the last flight for the day comes in!  She slid right into an interview and BAM - all done!  That saved her a four hour drive to Charlotte, Wilmington or Norfolk.   

In addition to the power of ASKING, I also saw the power of radical acceptance.  I like to think it’s always existed in this network, I just couldn’t put my finger on it until I read a book creatively titled Radical Acceptance (by Tara Brach).  Women get a lot of scrutiny and criticism in this culture.  We are bombarded with messages that we are too much or too little - too fat, too skinny, too loud, too quiet, too bossy, too messy, too flaky, not sexy enough, etc. etc.  In this network, we just do not make space for that noise.  We are each amazing in our own right, with a unique set of gifts and perspectives that can be of value in the collective.  Just come as you are, relax, and be ready to jump in when your gifts can help lift us . . .  but the default setting is to just “ride the wave” of fun and adventure, together.  
Two examples come to mind here, too.  One of our Costa Rica chicas, the night before we left, had her dog paw at her in the night and he hit the sensitive skin around her eye.  It hurt!  Wouldn’t you know, the next morning she had a deep purple black eye.  Instead of worrying about it, trying to cover it up, etc., she just led the way with an “it is what it is” mindset.  We all joined right in.  We named the bruise Bruce and didn’t think much of it except to laugh and concoct ridiculous origin stories she could tell people upon her return.  It WAS sweet when our tour guide Eduardo pulled her aside one day to ask if she was safe at home.  In the end there is not much he can do from Costa Rica about a badly behaved dog, but it was a nice gesture!

Another one of our Costa Rica chicas was a new traveler and immediately felt shame on the trip about overpacking.  We’ve all been there - it’s really easy to do!  We reassured her that while she might do differently next time, this time we could help literally ease her burdens!  My light-hearted suggestion to hold an exciting bonfire was not accepted (understandable, I suppose) and instead we moved on to conferring with our tour guide, finding another maleta (suitcase), and it all worked out and provided a hilarious adventure one afternoon in Monteverde.  But another really important reality is that she literally saved lives on our trip with the bounty of stuff she had!  One sister had a health issue and - ta da! - she had a pouch that could be ice pack or hot water bottle.  An hour drive to the hospital in the middle of the night was avoided. One day we needed tweezers and she had three kinds!  Oh, we laughed.  And it all worked out.
I have a theory that when we feel truly accepted and celebrated for who we are and what we bring to the “life party” we are attending, we can relax, let our defenses down, and lean into a growth mindset.  I see it again and again and I love that we are building a network with radical acceptance as a core concept.  
Thanks Costa Rica Chicas for such a great trip, and thanks to all the women who are helping build this network on a foundation of empowerment, dedication to collective wellbeing, and with a commitment to radical acceptance and a growth mindset.  Can’t wait for our next adventure!

When we started this network we created a survey that was intended to help “match” roommates based on personality, interests, sleep schedules, alcohol consumption and time management.  Women who register (for free!) as Travel Sisters  get a “code” and it helps us see who might be like-minded. Our monthly gatherings really help with compatibility matching, too!

Turns out, one of the most important factors is NOT a variable in that model and our gatherings don’t help either . . and for a good reason.  That key variable is SNORING!  Some of us snore, some of us don’t, some of us sleep like rocks and aren’t bothered by snoring, and some of us are driven crazy by it.  
The really tough part about this variable is that a lot of us don’t even KNOW if we snore.  Our partner may snore also and we “cancel” each other out, or we may not share a sleeping space with anyone who can tell us.  OR we might just not actually BELIEVE the person we share a sleeping space with, lol.  
So what is to be done?  I decided to lead by example since I strive to be the most flexible traveler on a group trip in terms of a willingness to share space or move rooms if needed due to illness, snoring, etc.  
I had to start with finding out IF I snore.  Here’s what I did:

1. I used my phone. You need about 1 GB of available storage on your phone to do this. I know some folks have cool health trackers that do this but I’m old school : )
2. I had a tool in my utilities called “Voice Memos” - you can also download an app that is a voice recorder - there are lots!
3. I put my phone next to my bed plugged into a charger and hit record and went to sleep.  
4. The next morning I stopped the recorder and went about my day.
5. Later, I opened the recording and analyzed it.  You do not need to listen to all the hours recorded.  You can visually analyze the sound waves as you fast forward through the recording. If you see something concerning you can stop and listen to just that part and discern how loud and consistent the sound was.  

I found out I have a very loud heating/air conditioning vent above my bed that needs to be tended to.  It rattles. I don’t appear to have a significant snoring habit (I’ll repeat this periodically to build a better date set) and that’s good to know!
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So, I’ve solved ONE side of the equation for me.  If I DID snore there are some snoring mitigation strategies I could test and try:

• Mouth tape
• Nose strips
• ​A night guard that holds your tongue in place or your jaw
• A chin strap that holds your mouth closed

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The OTHER side of the equation is what could I do if I find myself with a snorer? There are options there as well!  

• Ear plugs
• A tiny travel sound machine to help drown out the sound
• A headband with speakers built in to play white noise in your ears while you sleep.

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One thing Travel Sisters are consistently good at is being flexibly-minded problem solvers. It’s those characteristics that consistently amaze me when we are traveling together and endear me to our group. With a little assistance from technology, some innovative products, and a trial and error approach, we can head into a trip armed with self knowledge and strategies that will bring us ALL peace of mind - and a good night’s sleep - so we can PLAY ALL DAY!  As is our purpose and pledge : )
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Run the test, consider the best mitigation strategies for you, and girls, let’s get together and GOOOO!!!!

It’s been a while!  Just popping in with a quick update after a great Zoom meeting last night. Wow! This network is just humming along and we’re busy bees this spring!   Morocco was AMAZING, PHENOMENAL, EPIC . . . just all the things.  And it was not just about the location, or the itinerary; it was about the camaraderie and mutual support the Travel Sisters bring to every endeavor, whether it be a meeting or a trip.  
Last night Denise R and I were chatting after the Zoom trying to put our finger on what EXACTLY makes this model so powerful.  There’s lots of little things that are value-added - people there to watch your luggage, take your picture, help you haul some treasures home that won’t fit in your suitcase, share their battery charger.  But we were thinking about the bigger reality, and it hit me. 
It is very rare for women to experience freedom AND unity/togetherness simultaneously.  Often, when people gather and feel “together”, women are at work doing a lot of “shoulds.” Greeting, cooking, cleaning, serving, picking up . . . providing care. We love unity and togetherness so we do these things.  AND it is so very nice to have the peace and joy of unity without those “shoulds” whirling in our minds.  

​Denise and I were thinking how content we were in the Sahara in Morocco. Just sitting on a dune as the sun set, feeling safe, cared for, a part of something, and having the bandwidth to just . . . be.  Breathe. Feel. And know that later there would be a meal we did not cook, and a bed we did not make, and a sleep that would not be interrupted. It was just so glorious, and healing, and we all came home better people than when we left.  
Once you experience it, you are hooked. And that’s why we are so excited about the future.  About Spain, and Costa Rica, and the River Cruise, and Croatia.  Each of those represent another opportunity to feel that novel joy: freedom together.
Love to all who took the time to read this - be well and enjoy the journey!
Angie

It has been an action-packed 6 months for the Travel Sisters network and that’s been good for the network and bad for the blog!  We have many platforms we use to communicate - social media, our email list, Meet Up, Zooms, In person gatherings, trip specific meetings . . . but sometimes a good old blog post is just the right way to tell the bigger story of our network!  Here’s what we’ve been up to:

In May, nine “Greek Goddesses” (the name of the WhatsApp group for communication) had a wonderful time exploring Athens, the Greek Isles, Croatia, Slovenia, Montenegro and Venice!

In September, seventeen “Ice Queens” had an action-packed time in Iceland! My takeaway? Iceland is like if Hawaii, Ireland and Alaska had a baby, lol - amazing volcanic land forms, glaciers and waterfalls AND remote rolling pastures filled with sheep.

We’ve sold out our Morocco trip for March 2024, received deposits, booked flights, and purchased insurance!
Behind all that was a lot of other milestones - new swag, some power lunches for input and feedback, and creating new processes for tipping, group dining, and foreign currency needs!

We also are learning what is NOT working - top of mind on that is weekend getaways. We’ve floated out three of those (Sunset Beach, Luray Caverns, NYC) and had no luck filling them. Our takeaway for now is that we will focus on longer distance travel as there seems to be much more appetite for those experiences.

We also learned that while lots of our Travel Sisters are interested in Spain, they want an itinerary in Fall 2024 that involves staying multiple nights at each hotel. We’ve decided this fall might be a good time to hold some destination-specific Zooms to gauge what people want and then build itineraries around that feedback.  

We are learning that email is not going to work as a platform to “lift” significant work in the network and Zooms or in person meetings need to be very productive in terms of getting input and creating action items.  

In that spirit, we listened in our last in-person meeting and decided a rough outline for where we will likely go next and here’s the rough plan:

• Alaska Cruisetour - May/June 2024
• Southern Spain - September 2024
• Costa Rica- February 2025
• European River Cruise (Switzerland / Germany / The Netherlands)  OR Croatia- May 2025
• Scotland with Ireland add-on - September 2025
• Christmas Markets River Cruise - December 2025
• 2026 - Alaska, Iceland, a National Parks / American West option

We are scheduling the Spain related Zoom in the coming days; fill out this form if you want to be contacted  / included. 

I'll end ​with the toast delivered for the end of our Iceland adventure. That will always be a special memory for those helping to build this network - cheers!

To the Travel Sisters!
May the network grow wide, or may it grow deep,
Or may it do both!
And those gathered here keep
The story of the women
Who were fun and attractive,
But the most notable thing about them?
They are adaptive!
For they go together, and less money is spent,
So they can go farther,
And away they went!
To see the world and all its treasures,
sample its food, and gather its pleasures!
Three cheers for the women about whom they say
They truly knew how to seize the day!
Hip, hip, HOORAY!  Hip hip Hooray!

-In Honor of the 2023 Ice Queens